I had SO MUCH fun over mine and Matt’s birthday weekend (read all about it here) – but I am now officially back on the bandwagon, and ready to face my next challenge – who’s with me?!!
I promised you guys that I would be honest about what a weekend off of tracking food and exercising would do to my body & my brain, so read on for my thoughts, my progress pics and my quite shocking weight changes…
The first day of birthday weekend was lovely – I ate chocolate and cake, and I drank beer and cocktails. It felt nice and I actually felt quite relieved that I didn’t have to worry about what I was putting into my body 24/7. It was almost a weight off of my mind, which I’m sure a lot of you can relate to when taking a few days off. But, to tell you the truth, even by the end of that day I got those old familiar feelings running through my brain…telling me that I could eat something else if I wanted to – even though I wasn’t hungry.
HONESTY ALERT: I secretly ate pieces of chocolate and cake, turning straight back into that ‘Secret Eater’ that I used to be when I was younger (and mentally weaker, or so I thought). It was pure proof that foods with no nutritional value whatsoever weren’t satisfying me, my brain was just taking over and I just wanted to stuff my face with more and more.
My body reacted with all of these useless foods quite quickly, and I started to feel bloated and a little tighter in my clothes by day 2 and 3 of our birthday weekend. I didn’t feel as confident as I should have walking around in a bikini at Center Parcs, and I started making sure that I had baggy clothes packed to cover up. Not ideal, and not something that I ever wanted to do after all of the hard work that I have already put in to my transformation so far!
Still – I was eating mindlessly, and really not able to stop. All of the chocolately, sugary, carbyness was just soaking into my body and instantly disappearing – making room for some more.
Once mine and Matt’s birthday weekend was over, we headed back to mine from his parents and we spent the drive talking about this blog post and what was going into it.
I’m not normally one to admit what goes on in my brain surrounding food, but for once I actually found myself explaining to Matt what does happen and why I have to be so strict on myself sometimes (well, most of the time):
I constantly argue with myself and have to talk myself out of eating things, or talk myself into going to the gym or prepping good food for the week. During this very car journey I had already told myself that I may as well eat what I want for the rest of my week (aka, finish my Easter eggs) and then start again on Monday. Then I told myself that I needed to sort it out and go back to eating well and exercising straight away to combat what had happened over the weekend. I went back and forth with this argument for quite a while before talking to Matt and finally settling on the latter. Letting my brain win wasn’t something that I was prepared to do!!
It may seem trivial, and you might be saying to yourself ‘I do that all of the time’ but sometimes I spend hours on end going back and forth with my own arguments to try and figure myself out and get back on track. It takes a lot of mental strength and determination to get up on day and say ‘I’m gong to make that change’…
…but the next morning – I decided to jump on the scales and get the camera out to see what had changed since my weigh-in on Friday:
Have a look at that… Jeez
5lb weight gain and looking extremely bloated. You can even sense my unhappiness in the way I’m standing. It got me thinking whether the whole weekend of eating and drinking whatever was offered to me was really worth it, and this is now what I want to test…
If it takes 4 days for my body to change in this way – how long is it going to take for me to get back to feeling happy with the way I look?
I just want to see how quickly I can get back into the rhythm of smashing the gym and my nutrition and turn it all back around again. It’s a challenge – and we all know I love a challenge!
My Next Move…
Now I’ve had my fun, I’m ready to jump back on the proverbial bandwagon with a plan from BodyBuilding.com. I already went to the gym on my first day ‘back’ on Wednesday (which took a lot of determination) and I completed a home workout today when I couldn’t get to the gym.
I showed some real progress when I did the Erin Stern Elite Body Programme – weight loss, fat loss and inches dropping off all over my body, so I am going to download that plan and start from the beginning again.
I feel as if I know what I am doing now, and because I won’t be linking it with 10k training this time around, I will really be able to load on the weights and work really hard to smash my goals.
I want to see how quickly I can turn this all around and start feeling happy with the way I look again – and of course I will keep you all up to date with how it’s all going. If it turns out that I can turn it all back around in a short amount of time, then I won’t have a problem at all with saying that having a few days off is OK, but if it takes as long as I think it might – I will know full well that it’s really not worth feeling this way just because I wanted a long weekend off.
It’s going to take dedication and determination… blinkers on, focused.